friends?

friends are people that we can trust .. people that we can count on no matter what .. but to be quite honest to have a good friend u must be one ...

I think that i have been a good friend all my life.. when someone asks me to keep a secret i do.. when someone is in trouble i help them.. i care .. but all my friends on the other hand have all been well... not up to my expectations..

like the other day when two of my closest buddies were drunk who was it that helped them?? ME !! i could have gotten drunk too .. and did stupid shit .. but i chose not too.. coz i knew that they needed me ..

I know im kinda expecting too much .. but it would be nice if they gave me a call once or twice a week asking how i am .. and not wait for me to call ..

U know what i think that my rant is done for now lol .. the more i think about it .. the more i seem to realize that my friends were there for me .. they helped me through the good and bad times .. and that sometimes even i seem to forget that ... and i think that they have forgotten it too...

Sri lankan parents

Some times don't u feel like ur not living ur own life.. and ur living ur life according to what ur parents have always wanted their life to be? It's weird .. I love my parents so much .. they have done so much for me. They have always put my interests before their own. But sometimes i feel like that i don't want everything that they want.

I am Sri lankan, and having "brown" parents made things even more difficult for me. They left Sri lanka for me, for my future.. and when ever i do something wrong or i get into trouble they always give me the " why we came to Canada .." lecture, to make me feel guilty. Its so unfair don't u think?

But the worst thing of all is that the fact that they expect me to behave like an Sri lankan girl in Canada. That's hard if u all know what i mean ... ive been living here for quite along time and even though i have never forgotten the sri lankan culture and traditions its kinda hard for me to incorporate those things into my life here..

Like i know in Sri lanka girls don't really go out and be out at night, i know that they are not wild and go out and drink and all that ( I'm not saying that these things are good and that I'm doing them ok ). Its just weird coz I'm in Uni and these are the things that people do here .....( especially in unis) and when i don't go out and stay secluded ( like my parents want me to be) i miss out on everything ... ( i basically miss out on the fun part of being in Uni ) .

When i ask my parents why i cant go out and all they are like " pissuda ... mehe lamai wage haddennada yanne..." ( I cant help it when I'm around "mehe lamai" 24/7 !!!!) My friends don't even ask me out anymore coz they know that my answer would be "No, my parents wont let me" its pathetic actually !!

How am i supposed to get ready for the "real world" if i don't get the experiences that i need to survive ? How am i supposed to network or to be social ?

Well i guess that's enough ranting now ... :(

I wish i was white !!